My Feelings For Love Will Be Gone In A While.....

Yesterday was like another sad day ever for me. Yesterday, my dear and I were talking through Messenger and talked. When she said she went out with her 'mataer'( or in English: darling), I was shocked and was if my life was pulled back. I suddenly stopped time again and asking to myself, if she went out with mataer, then what does that makes me? I knew her about a month and 2 weeks and counting and she replied I was her special friend that lies in heart. I was confused and at the same time, angry. Then when no one was home except me, I screamed out loud in the house. Then, she started to piss me off and makes me screamed louder thna before. But I have to control myself and in my mind, my dear using her sweet and beautiful voice and her cute smile on her she helped me to calm msyelf down.This morning, she repied that the mataer is the guy that I didn't know.

I felt kind of suspicious( and dear if u are raeding , no offense). In her friendster,I replied back of asking her for exaple how old is he? He is in which school? I was feeling that I want to know more about him. Kinda weird right? Right now and this very instant, I felt that my heart of feelings has a small hole and it is leaking out slowly.I asked her when to call the doc as she knew the doct well and can prescribed me what to cure it. I will be waiting for her answer really soon.As for now, I, msyself as the victim is trying to stop the leak and I don't know how much longer I can hold. I hoped that she can give the answer before it's too late. As for the Valentine's Day, now I am not sure whether to give or not to give her my gift to her. I am now in confusion at the moment so I will have to think about it. I am now struggling, holding my heart of feelings and I don't know how much longer I can hold.

So is there anything to comment? Just post it on my friendster and just leave a comment.

Gotta go, signing off.

Mr F.D.T