What Do I Do Now? Hurt Him Or Save Her?

I am now in distress. Two days ago, my special friend called me and told me her problem. After hearing it, I felt fed-up and ous towards her boyfriend. I felt like KILLING him badly and make sure his face will be broken. She was crying so badly that she made me cry too. If I knew where he stays, I'll make sure I chased after him and make him say sorry to my friend. She said her heart was broken and he is the only one who can mend or heal her heart. I gave her some advice and I ran out of advice. In school, I was so fed up that I can barely concentrate on my studies and the same time I pity her a lot. I know how it feels though I had never been in a B.G.R before. At that night, we talked through Messenger and talked about her problem. It's like choosing between friends or family and it's really hard to choose. If I hurt him, he cannot talk because I will broke his face by then and if he cannot talk, how he wanna to talk to her?

Maybe I talked to her when I go out with her for lunch next,next Monday. And I hope her relationship with her boyfriend will last forever til' the Day of Love: Valentine' s Day which is 3 weeks and 3days and counting. If she cries again, I'll make sure I will run like hell and chase her boyfriend and ( my special friend boyfriend, if you are reading, BETTER WATCH OUT!!!). Even, at this very moment I am mad. As for my friend, you should call him Now!! and talk to him. If you don't feel confident, how are you going to end your problem? Want me to talk to him? Of course, you will say NO! so be brave and call him, OKAY?

Gotta Go...See ya. And please do comment .....
Signing off
Yours faithfully, Mr F.D.T

One Day, She Will Be Mine And Always Be In My Heart

It's been a long time since I call her my dear. It was a month since I met her and right now, she has a boyfriend and as for me, I am just a friend that was left behind. I still cared for her though she has a bf and hoped she will study hard so she will go to a polytechnic/ JC so as to get a course that she liked. As for me, I have to study extremely hard as I have 8 more months to go to my O level exams but there is something distracting me.Maybe is my feeling for her because what can I think is only her and that's all. I just don't know why I can't stop thinking about her . Is it wrong to do this or is it just love? I cannot control this feeling and I wondered how am I supposed to control this feeling. Valentine's Day is coming and I can't wait for that day and she too can't wait. Sometimes, everyday I feel like our friendship between me and her are drifting away like the stormy sea, blowing a ship. On the 13th Feb, I will recommend giving a lot of love songs to the radio and celebrate that day. She will be going out with her new boyfriend on the actual day and will have a romantic day together while as for me, I will stay at home. Now, I am kind of jealous that she has a boyfriend and I, myself donn't even know why.

In my school, it's windy and when it blew my face, it reminds of my memories of her like meeting her. talking to her on my handphopne and lots of more. It was like the first time we taled and it is as if it was yesterday. I missed her so much that I wanna hug her a lot and wished not to let go. I don't know what to say right now and at the same time very emotional. I will one day wished upon a star that she will be mine and always be mine in my true heart one day.

New Boyfriend, New Bodyguard On Standby!

Hey there, viewers. Mr F.D.T is here. Well, you hvae known and read the last post. For my heart, it is stll leaking out. I don't know how much I can take. I'm later calling the doctor. Few days back, she went out with her new boyfirend and you all knew what HAPPENED?! OMG!! They went to the park together and so romatic ( sorry, can't name the park) and guessed what they did. I am not going to tell as it is a private thing that they did and she might scold me or even worse won't be my freind forever. So I am not going to tell, I hope you, viewers understand why. It is hard to make new friends especially her as she si the girl that I can share my problems with unlike those in my school and in my class. They won't help to solve any of my problems of mine. She is the most understanding to me. Not even my closet freinds will be as close as her.

I told her to warn her new boyfriend to make her sad or break her heart but she didnn't so I telling you publically( refering to my speciual freind boyfriend and don't be a blur 'sotong'). I'm serious about and don't take a joke on this. I swear it WON'T BE PLEASANT WHEN YOU MESS WITH ME!!!!! YOU BETTER NOT PLAY WITH HER HEART OR BREAK HER HEART OR EVEN MAKE HER CRY AND IF YOU DO, I'M COMING FOR YOU SO WATCH YOUR BACK!!!! Now, back to my post, I will be on standby and friend( refering to my special freind), if anyhting happens, just call me anytime and don't hesistate to call me alright. I definitely pick up my handphone. Alright, gotta study ...

Any comments? Post it to my freindster: MR FDT WAS BORN
Gotta go!

My Feelings For Love Will Be Gone In A While.....

Yesterday was like another sad day ever for me. Yesterday, my dear and I were talking through Messenger and talked. When she said she went out with her 'mataer'( or in English: darling), I was shocked and was if my life was pulled back. I suddenly stopped time again and asking to myself, if she went out with mataer, then what does that makes me? I knew her about a month and 2 weeks and counting and she replied I was her special friend that lies in heart. I was confused and at the same time, angry. Then when no one was home except me, I screamed out loud in the house. Then, she started to piss me off and makes me screamed louder thna before. But I have to control myself and in my mind, my dear using her sweet and beautiful voice and her cute smile on her she helped me to calm msyelf down.This morning, she repied that the mataer is the guy that I didn't know.

I felt kind of suspicious( and dear if u are raeding , no offense). In her friendster,I replied back of asking her for exaple how old is he? He is in which school? I was feeling that I want to know more about him. Kinda weird right? Right now and this very instant, I felt that my heart of feelings has a small hole and it is leaking out slowly.I asked her when to call the doc as she knew the doct well and can prescribed me what to cure it. I will be waiting for her answer really soon.As for now, I, msyself as the victim is trying to stop the leak and I don't know how much longer I can hold. I hoped that she can give the answer before it's too late. As for the Valentine's Day, now I am not sure whether to give or not to give her my gift to her. I am now in confusion at the moment so I will have to think about it. I am now struggling, holding my heart of feelings and I don't know how much longer I can hold.

So is there anything to comment? Just post it on my friendster and just leave a comment.

Gotta go, signing off.

Mr F.D.T

Busy! Busy! Busy!

Starting on this Tuesday, my life will be turn upside down big time. I gonna be bsuy as I will have infocus aka remedial / extra classes as I will be having my O levels exams ina few months time in the early Oct to . Too bad for me as I can't celebrate my 17th birthday as it collides with my exams. I seriously hate infocus but I do not have any choices and if I don't have attend, I msut give an MC or else BIG trouble. It is tiring, just to stay back for extra classes and especially during June holidays where we have to go back to school for the 4E/5N as we have to prepare for the exams. As for this coming Monday, the 4E and the 5N in the year 2008 will be coming back to school to get their results of the O levels and so are the current 5N( Mother tongue and E Maths). The 5N will be getting their N levels certificates by earliest 15 February and I can't wait to get my certificate.Yahoo!!!!!.I now have to study very hard to get very good results for my O level exams so as to get to go to a good polytechnic and getting a course that is good for me.

Especially on the 13th of February, I will hoped(Muslim word: berdoa)that there will be no infocus as so that to see my valentine and give her my gift.I also hoped that during that day, I will go back with her, taking the same bus and seating together.I hoped it will go according to plan. I hope it does as that is the last time I'm going to see her for the next 7-8 months.( Crying......).Damn me! I can't think of anything else to write...Oh well, do comment me okay, viewers at my friendster...

My Saddest Day of My Life

Yesterday was the worst day of my entire life.Yesterday night, I and my dear were chatting online through MSN Messenger for an hour or so. We began chatting about school, our life and lots of many other stuffs. Then after that, we talk to each other through poetry which was interesting.We started saying romance poems, slowly starting to change poems from romance to sad and emotional poems that I, myself started to cry. Two poems that I knew that she wrote to mebut I can only tell you one only. One was,' When you see the full moon, that's when you know how much I love you but as moonlight fades, my love for you disappears, I' sorry'. By this poem, I was crying a lot of tears until I cried no more.That was the saddest poem I had in my whole life!.Yet I replied her back but I won't tell you viewers what I said to her as it is personal between us both. Before we signed off, I tel to have agood night sleep and sweet dreams. Lastly saying to her: 'Good night my love of my life' and she replied back: 'Good night my love and friend'. That to me was the most beautiful and nicest phrase that anyone told me.Before I shut down my computer and press the Enter button, I tell myself that I will not forget what I chat with her.

After shutting down my computer, I went outside of my home and saw a star. I wised on that star, I wihsed I will see her again during Valentine's Day and in future. If I were to make another wish, it would be to make her to be my GF one day. Before I sleep, I pray my last prayer( Those Muslim who knows it is Isyak) and wished( doa) that I see her again in my dreams. Even before I sleep, I still kpet crying as I remebered the chat. After a a few minutes, I stopped and went to sleep.Today, I went to school with no mood to talk. During recess, after eating, Iwent to a secret place and asked how to solve my problem. I cared about my dear and my exams as well. In addition I have no freedom unless frinds invite to go out.I hope I will find a solution but yesterday was the Saddest day of my whole life and I would like to share,As for my dear, Ican't mention her name as it is a promise to be kept between me and her.

Loneliness In My Life..

Hi viewers..Mr FDT is here. I want to tell you some part of my life ..sometimes in school , I feel lonely though I have friends in school and also in my friendster and so forth..but I feel that I was on the only boy in the entire world in my heart.In class, everybody talks to each other and I see them talking a lot but by looking at them, I felt that no one bothered to talk to me like as if I don't exist in the class though I was the chairperson of the class..Sometimes the class don't even show respect when I asked them to stand up to greet the teacher...they behaved like animals especially those like a boy in my class who think he is so 'pekak' or deaf in Malay(no offence)...and those in my friendster which some of them in my school won't talk to me and I know they will be busy sometimes but they should talk to me once.........

Why can't my friends talk to me? When I'm in my own world, everybody is friendly with me and talks to me but in reality, they talked to their friends and ignored me. I feel empty in my heart and the only person in my school...'O' level exams are coming and the pressure is on to me. Those who are true friends would noticed me and would talk to me either by handphone/sms/talk to me in person/.... I don't know what to do now or where to go. Where are my friends when I need their help?